What is a Poisonous Friend
The Poisonous Friend is probably one of the most destructive social bullies that exist. Poisonous Friends seem quite innocuous and at one point in your life have probably been your best friend or close family relative. They appear to have the save interests, ideas, and outlook on life that you do. They encourage you, protect you, and help you during times of stress. They are by all accounts your friend.
But their is a sinister quality that the poisonous friend possesses. The poisonous friend is a manipulator. They use trust as a means of manipulating circumstances in their favor. They recognize the law of reciprocity and act upon it to your detriment. They do so usually by helping you at your lowest point. They may have let you stay at their house for six months when you lost your job. They may have consoled you during a bad breakup. They may have given you money when you were financially insolvent. Whatever the case may be, the poisonous friend then uses such good deeds to blackmail and shame you into giving something in return that far exceeds what they have done for you.
The poisonous friend let you stay at his house when you were out of work, he now wants you to help him embezzle money from the company retirement account.
The poisonous friend consoled you during a bad breakup, she now sabotages any relationship that can help to rebuild your life.
The poisonous friend loans you money in your time of need, she now expects to borrow money from you until the end of time no matter what the cost.
How do their actions affect you
After the blackmailing stage one will witness a profound change in the behavior of the poisonous friend. The poisonous friend will become very jealous of your success and begin to lead you to make bad decisions. They will grow increasingly more selfish and require you to furnish all of their needs no matter the cost to you. They will constantly refer to the one or two times in their life when they supported you as a means to manipulate you into to giving them your money, your time, or expensive gifts even after you have re paid them back two-fold. Their constant conscious assault assault will cripple your self confidence and leave you scrambling to regain your self identity.
How to hack the Poisonous Friend
The poisonous friend usually possesses key characteristics. They are overly nice when they first meet you and are quick to offer some sort of helpful sponsorship . Kill em with kindness is their moto. Cults use a similar technique called happiness bombing to recruit new members. Being nice is a way to earn your trust and then use that trust against you. Still even though the poisonous friend may appear overly nice they never seem to have any real substantial relationships with other people. This is what separates them from a truly genuine friend. A genuine friend will have other friends that reflect a healthy state of being. Likewise the poisonous friend will be very critical of others and try to destroy any relationship that may allow you see the poisonous friend for who they really are.
The problem with the poisonous friend is that we generally realize their true intentions after the blackmail phase. It may be hard to ask yourself if you are honestly giving more in the relationship than they are giving you. Are they becoming increasingly jealous, trying to sabotage your personal growth, or making unreasonable requests? If the answer is yes do not try to reason with them – they will only guilt trip you. Break all ties immediately and never look back.